Thursday, June 24, 2010

Granny vamps

This week's Thursday inspiration is more ridiculous than anything.

We were discussing vampire books in critique group this week and someone pointed out that part of the allure of vampires in these books is that they all got frozen in immortality at the ripe young, gorgeous age of 16 or 17.

"Where are the books about old and ugly vampires?" someone said.

Which got us started giggling. Can't you see the cover of the book? With three or four seriously old vampires glaring in the "I know you think I'm sexy" way over the top of their bifocals? Vampires who have to have their blood pre-sucked and put in a cup with a straw. Vampire early bird specials. Vampires in house slippers.

Oh, the video I would make you, had I endless time and technical skill: I keep picturing Bella Swan's voice from the movie previews saying, "You're impossibly fast" and seeing a vampire played by Tim Conway from the old Carol Burnett shows. But, alas, I cannot make it, seeing as how I have much kitten-watching to do today. So who will write me the book?

And because I cannot pass up Tim Conway...

3 comments:

WordWrangler said...

Oh Tim... one of my all time faves. Have you had the pleasure of viewing the movie Private Eyes with Tim Conway and Don Knotts? Hilarious. Seriously.

Old vamps - hmmm. Good point. It's like making a summer camp/slasher film with Betty White. Then again, she's pretty cool. It just might work. :)

J. Thorp said...

what fun this would be ...

cath c said...

ah yes, i have been doing hte tim conway shuffle for weeks now with my torn tendon ankle.