Thursday, January 29, 2009

Why not a cheetah?

In which I am left uncharacteristically speechless.

Sometimes I struggle to find the story in the Thursday News of the Absurd Will Someone Please Write This Book Inspirational Moment (TNoftheAWSPWTBIM). And then some weeks, it falls into my lap fully formed and all I can do is stare and say, "Wow."

From YahooNews and the AP:

Newspaper claims suspect transformed into a goat

One of Nigeria's biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. In a front-page article on Friday, the Vanguard newspaper said that two men tried to steal a Mazda car two days earlier in Kwara State, with one suspect transforming himself into a goat as vigilantes cornered him.

All that work to transmogrify and caught anyway. Man, that's rough. My only question is: why a goat?! Why not something with a fighting chance of running away?! And is he gonna get made fun of next week at black magic burglar school or what?

We've discussed goats in handcuffs before, but never shapeshifting ones. Do you think this might explain Elise's problem?

10 comments:

C.R. Evers said...

you're right. WOW! Maybe even shapeshifters have their limitations. Maybe goat was the best he could do.

LOL about getting laughed at in black magic school. ;0D

Elise Murphy said...

Goats have many wonderful traits, astounding capabilities, and the best negotiating skills . . . and you'd better watch it or the Goat Council is going to sue you for defamation!

Paul Michael Murphy said...

Funny

Do you think they bothered to read him his rights?

J. Thorp said...

Perhaps the suspect was a weregoat. Or perhaps it's simply an unusual reaction to stress, like really, really (really) bad hives. He breaks out on hooves, hair and horns ...

Or maybe it was the goat that shed its man suit at the last minute -- can't steal a car as a goat, or everyone will notice!

Jacqui said...

Christy, I'm glad you laughed. It occurred to me later that making fun of black magic is probably a bad karma thing to do...

Elise, I didn't mean YOUR goats. I meant, um, my other goat friends from camp.

Paul, do you suppose "Ma-aa-aa" could be held against you in a court of law?

Thorp, the reaction to stress is my favorite. I talk too much; others bleat.

Brenda said...

Maybe he's like Samantha's aunt from Bewitched (and her name escapes me at the moment)...he was trying to turn into something else...like a coat...so he would just be hanging there and no one would think twice about him, but he messed up and became a goat...grin...

Jacqui said...

Aah, Brenda, I bet you're right. Like in Sylvester and the Magic Pebble (which you should all read if you haven't -- awesome book and fantastic read aloud), when he accidentally turns himself into a rock.

Kelly Polark said...

Was it a man with a goatee that transformed into a goat?
Maybe he was trying to turn into a kid...

Mary Witzl said...

I love goats, but I wouldn't want to shape-shift into one.

Those shining goat eyes were great, and they really did look like they were plotting something. Back in Scotland, we used to go walking in the country at night and sheeps' eyes shine just the same way -- so eerie.

Jacqui said...

Mary: I think of sheep as so gentle; that would be creepy, I think. And where HAVEN'T you lived?!

Kelly: hee hee.